Struck bird
- albrightyo
- Regular Member
- Posts: 37
- Joined: January 22nd, 2014, 1:57 pm
- Location: Calgary, Alberta
Struck bird
Struck bird
Silence speaks a loud voice,
Break down gentle in your shivering,
Icy Cold rivers run like the streams on my face,
Hands grown cold with this frost,
Pray for the fallen angel that I have lost,
Prairie Grass Brushes my dry ankles,
Twisting reality into surreal trips of sadness,
A small wind of whispers and sends word,
I am lost like an anxiety struck bird,
Fists clenched with frustration,
Swallows of Tar and fume,
The ever falling thoughts loom,
Dust and hot blood cake cracked knuckles,
Hot swelling rage boils deep in the lungs,
Excreting flaunting f--- fears,
All I ever wanted was you near.
Silence speaks a loud voice,
Break down gentle in your shivering,
Icy Cold rivers run like the streams on my face,
Hands grown cold with this frost,
Pray for the fallen angel that I have lost,
Prairie Grass Brushes my dry ankles,
Twisting reality into surreal trips of sadness,
A small wind of whispers and sends word,
I am lost like an anxiety struck bird,
Fists clenched with frustration,
Swallows of Tar and fume,
The ever falling thoughts loom,
Dust and hot blood cake cracked knuckles,
Hot swelling rage boils deep in the lungs,
Excreting flaunting f--- fears,
All I ever wanted was you near.
"I built a wooden heart in this iron chest" - Listener
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Re: Struck bird
<gasps> now I'm worried someone is going to get it...if they haven't already. This shows a dark side of affection...'if not mine then no ones!' if you take it that way. truly! harrowing...dew
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Re: Struck bird
definitely a trip to the dark side of affection...
well written - emotional,angry stuff.
well written - emotional,angry stuff.
- candlewitch
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- Jaz
- Regular Member
- Posts: 92
- Joined: April 18th, 2012, 4:03 am
- Location: UK
Re: Struck bird
Immediately from that first sentence you had my attention, right until that final dark verse and final word. Very wickedly fuelled words here, with a hint of mystery and perfect imagery thorough. Extremely well done. :)
- Windsend
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- Location: Awaiting Repose
Re: Struck bird
Hello, nice read. I particularly like this line. I had a player character on Everquest 2 a few years back. It's a MMORPG from Sony. My avatars name was 'Windsend Whispersongs'. I also used the name here for the TPS forums. If you have any connection to the game send me a PM.albrightyo wrote:Struck bird
A small wind of whispers and sends word,
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Spirabilis Receptaculum -
My Poems and "Wind Form" Poem Instruction
All work under, 'Windsend', is subject to my legal; Copyright Reserved 2014-23, USA.
My Poems and "Wind Form" Poem Instruction
All work under, 'Windsend', is subject to my legal; Copyright Reserved 2014-23, USA.
- Elm46
- Regular Member
- Posts: 240
- Joined: July 20th, 2014, 7:14 pm
- Location: Wyoming, USA
Re: Struck bird
It definitely is easy to pick up on the kind of calm subtle anger that so willfully encouraged this poem. An angel lost is something that I too would seek in desperation.
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Spring
Erlöse mich
Spring
Enttäusch mich nicht
Spring für mich
Spring ins Licht
Spring
-Rammstein
- AM616
- Regular Member
- Posts: 101
- Joined: April 9th, 2013, 10:07 pm
Re: Struck bird
This was fantastic. You couldn't help but feel the sadness and anger radiating from this individual's thoughts. I think people often forget that sadness and anger can go hand and hand. Lovely piece and thanks for sharing.
"MUSIC speaks what cannot be expressed
soothes the mind and gives it rest
heals the heart and makes it whole
flows from heaven to the soul."
soothes the mind and gives it rest
heals the heart and makes it whole
flows from heaven to the soul."
- AM616
- Regular Member
- Posts: 101
- Joined: April 9th, 2013, 10:07 pm
Re: Struck bird
This was fantastic. You couldn't help but feel the sadness and anger radiating from this individual's thoughts. I think people often forget that sadness and anger can go hand and hand. Lovely piece and thanks for sharing.
"MUSIC speaks what cannot be expressed
soothes the mind and gives it rest
heals the heart and makes it whole
flows from heaven to the soul."
soothes the mind and gives it rest
heals the heart and makes it whole
flows from heaven to the soul."
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Re: Struck bird
Well done on a most deserving spotlight. Wonderful write. ( maybe needs a language warning)?
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