A glass of water, a breath of air
And I swallow the bittersweet pill of reality
Before my fantasies, my make-believe worlds
Liquify the remaining pieces of my sanity
They're here somewhere, the other pieces,
Scattered on the blood coloured floor
And I'll find them all once again
And store them in my pocket, for a rainy day
Till then it's bittersweet pills for breakfast
And make-believe worlds for lunch
And a dose of giggling madness and knife edged lunacy
Just to help me sleep through the night
The best medicine.
-
- Regular Member
- Posts:129
- Joined:September 15th, 2012, 6:40 pm
“I turned silences and nights into words. What was unutterable, I wrote down. I made the whirling world stand still.” ― Arthur Rimbaud,
-
- Regular Member
- Posts:129
- Joined:September 15th, 2012, 6:40 pm
Re: The best medicine.
Thanks.I'm trying to improve, since I have a habit of editing my poems and OM is still new for me.The first stanza is my favourite too :P.
“I turned silences and nights into words. What was unutterable, I wrote down. I made the whirling world stand still.” ― Arthur Rimbaud,
-
- Elite Member
- Posts:4023
- Joined:April 14th, 2012, 4:32 pm
- Contact:
Re: The best medicine.
This is fabulous. I really like the way this progresses, I think for me the last stanza stands out the most, it really brings it all together and it's such a striking set of phrases and images drawn from it. A really edgy kind of perspective, I gotta say I enjoyed the punchy, almost sarcastic tone this has. Really cool OM work!
Lily^^
Lily^^
"The night is dark and full of terrors."
- Chelle
- Webmaster
- Posts:2782
- Joined:April 15th, 2012, 12:09 am
- Location:Florida
- Contact:
Re: The best medicine.
Simple but effective, though it still allows the reader many possible interpretations. Sometimes we have to have both reality and a little bit of fantasy to get through the day.
Looking For a Few Good Staff:If you're thinking about being a moderator-please check this out and apply!
TPS Moderator Application
TPS Moderator Application
- IronHeart
- Regular Member
- Posts:672
- Joined:February 2nd, 2014, 6:17 pm
- Contact:
Re: The best medicine.
The struggle of remaining sane between the temptation of ideal fantasy and harsh reality is very well portrayed here and is artfully done. I enjoyed the entire work, I could relate to it easily. Thanks for sharing this.
- oursummertrees
- Regular Member
- Posts:232
- Joined:April 19th, 2012, 3:18 pm
- Location:Japan
Re: The best medicine.
I'm glad I slipped back into the pages of the OM and found this little gem. I loved the progressive and the imagery, and as Lily mentioned above, I like the tone. Thanks for sharing!
-A.
-A.
most recent:tokyo, february 23
poet file