My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

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lonelystar53
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My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by lonelystar53 » December 2nd, 2012, 11:29 am

My Mother made me cry today.
She told me I was:
Fat
Worthless
Stupid.
So I cried my eyes into my many bears and pillows,
But none could mend my broken childish heart.

My Mother made me cry today.
When I yelled back, she yelled:
b-----
s---
Ungrateful.
So I cried into my many books and magazines,
But none could bandage the empty ache amidst my other growing pains.

My Mother made me cry today.
I tried to tell her how I felt,
and I tried to tell to hold back the tears
As she yelled:
Lair
Lazy
Egotistical.
I cried into the shoulders of friends and men,
But none filled me the way I thought a Mother's love should.

I made my Mother cry today.
I had earned the right, for I had a degree.
I yelled at her:
Unaccomplished
Psychotic
Abusive.
Seeing those tears stream down her face
Though did not make my aches end.

So I inquired why she yelled at me...
I don't deserve a child like you.
I am all the things I call you.
It's only right for me to receive,
the pain of watching you cry.

My Mother made me cry today.
She had died.
And I had lost the only person
who had ever truly known me.


You are a flower. Rarely found and beautiful beyond measure, you are also vain and selfish. You often allow your pride to get in the way of your true feelings. Despite this, you are truly loved and treasured.

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the quiet poet
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today

Post by the quiet poet » December 5th, 2012, 9:34 am

So beautiful :( Heartbreaking... I'd definetely reccomend this as one in the spotlights.


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trace
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by trace » December 5th, 2012, 4:48 pm

Wow, what a great piece of reflection on the relationship of parent and child and how, much too late, we realize the loss and how important that relationship was. But, I think the speakers anger was never satisfied and at the one point where I thought it would be, I was left with a hollow empty feeling. It's a love hate relationship at the end.


"Repugnant is a creature who would squander the ability to lift their eye to heaven conscious of their fleeting time here."

everhopeful
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by everhopeful » December 7th, 2012, 2:16 pm

The ending really comes as a shock after something penned with such ferocious tone and content, it really brings everything back down to earth and shows that even within a traumatic parental relationship there can still be love and understanding.
Nice use of structure in the earlier stanzas helped to build an expectation which made the ending come as more of a jolt.



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robema1
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by robema1 » December 7th, 2012, 5:56 pm

Made me feel how scary all poetry can be, when it touches where no one has defiance.

Cheers Rob



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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by rootbeer » December 9th, 2012, 8:03 am

such a sad ending, beautifully written, and I'm in awe of the last 3 paragraphs.

Respectfully,
Rootz


Respectfully,
Michael "rootbeer" Lowe

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songofmeadow
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by songofmeadow » December 9th, 2012, 11:41 am

A well deserved spotlight, the shock in the complex revelations are almost jaw dropping, very very good, meadow


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tangerinepie
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by tangerinepie » December 9th, 2012, 1:25 pm

Hello..Raw and sorrowful.definitely and infinitely a revelation of angst that is heart rending.Thank you for sharing these emotions, and perhaps in the writing of this, some peace may be found..Excellent spotlight choice..T..


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flux
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by flux » December 9th, 2012, 1:53 pm

This feels like an instinctive poem, the sort that comes out of nowhere, the sort that surprises the poet. I admired the form, the presentation of this too, it gave the poem rhythm.


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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by Poetress » December 10th, 2012, 8:32 am

Powerfully sad and gritty. I picture of the phrase hurt people, hurt people. There is nothing like the love of a mom that our hearts long for.


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LauraMarie
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by LauraMarie » December 10th, 2012, 3:21 pm

This piece is particularly shocking! I found the end powerful, emotional, and honest. I loved your use of repetition throughout the entire poem. Great write. You certainly deserved this win!!!


Always,
Laura

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the quiet poet
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by the quiet poet » December 11th, 2012, 10:46 am

I bookmarked this, I still find it awesome. Great work, loved reading it again, and I'm glad to see that it climbed up to the spotlight :)


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karrie
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by karrie » December 12th, 2012, 12:36 am

This really got to me. Congratulations on the spotlight! :smile:



everhopeful
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by everhopeful » December 12th, 2012, 1:31 pm

Although I felt your original board choice of the anger was a good one, I was immediately struck by how many different emotional elements were contained within, and I greatly admired the structure of this one and what it added to the impact.
Congratulations on the spotlight.



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SirDaniel
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by SirDaniel » December 13th, 2012, 7:07 am

time is a mystery to us all.. why people treat us like they do is something we may spend out lives wondering about but when time ends, we no longer have a chance of finding that answer. Such a sad write, to grow up with verbal abuse, find out as an adult it was miss-directed and then to lose that person you wanted to impress all your life is an emotional roller-coaster we all ride at times..

Lovely write, although it is so sad.. congratulations on being spotlighted.

~ Daniel



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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by ladymaybebaby » December 13th, 2012, 1:41 pm

Congratulations on the spotlight! This piece is well deserving of being highlighted. That twist at the end I never saw coming, it stopped me in my tracks. It was so sad... A beautifully penned piece, so much feeling
and you left this reader to bookmark this piece for my private collection to enjoy over and over again. Thanks for sharing this and congrats again!

-LMB
xoxo


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musie
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by musie » December 14th, 2012, 8:22 am

OMG! This was absolutely beautiful and so heart wrenching...I could identify so much it's unbelievable...a truly wonderful piece from your pen..and so well written..there is no doubt why this was Spotlighted...CONGRATULATIONS! Musie


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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by inflames » December 14th, 2012, 2:28 pm

Wow... this has a deep sadness to it, but it's really nicely written. Wonderful work. Congrats!


"I don't see novels ending with any real sense of closure."
– Michael Ondaatje


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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by E.S. » December 14th, 2012, 4:20 pm

Talk about spotlight. That was amazing, the ending was the best for me though (not saying that I'm happy that your mother died). Very hard to put what I feel about this poem into words, it was just powerful. That ending...shivers.



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3M2R
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Re: My Mother Made Me Cry Today (language)

Post by 3M2R » December 15th, 2012, 10:54 am

a beautifully written piece. i guess despite how much they abuse you verbally or physically, they still love you the most.

a wonderful tribute to your mom.

thank you for sharing!

Dreamer


My demons coo in darkness and light: I am my darker self, my anti-self.

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