The Ground Beneath Our Feet

[dornicks]

In a sweat in a maze in the dark of the night
with no entrance nor exit, no left nor a right
not a hope of a change no solution at hand
but I've got to remain 'till I know who I am.
Obsesive compulsive disorder would fit
I've been wandering round for a life and a bit
started cursing and praying one day that I'll find
the reason I think I'm going out of my mind.

Am I crazy for thinking we've all lost our way
with no time for each other,so little to say
without time for 'hellos' in a rush with 'goodbyes'
so distracted by gadgets we''re pressured to buy.
Will we ever find time or a place to reflect
do we do anything for the weak and the sick
can we not see the people who live on the street
if it's not on our mind then it's under our feet.

[tangerinepie]

Hi..needed this great poem tonight, it made me think of wasted time that I could have spent more wisely.The last stanza is the heart and soul of life today as we know it.Another exceptional write Dornicks..Tangie..

[ladymaybebaby]

This is such a trending topic, certainly in my house it is. While my youngest who is still at home and all wired up 24/7 I fear that her generation will lose some of the humanity that is essential in the world. Without a sense of compassion and willingness to serve others what will become of us? Well done as always!

-LMB
xoxo

[Rassy48]

dornicks,
I certainly think you have this write in the correct place. It is somewhat tragic what is happening around us today. Most people seem so self-involved in their own lives and their own wants not to look around and see what is beyond their own backdoors. Wonderful write, my friend. Words so true and so sad. Another ace on winner!
Joanne

[musie]

I have to agree with what has already been said about this piece dornick's...you have certainly tugged on the heart string's and mind's of those who are lost and wondering what the right thing's are to do in this life...I really like what Robin had to say about this, it is SO true, particularly when it comes to the younger generation....Sadly, it may become more tragic, if people don't wake up and start flying right...A great piece....Musie

[dornicks]

Many thanks for all the kind words,each valued.

dornicks

[Dew]

Ground shaking achievement! I adored the science of your approach...and not the form or rhythm (both spot on)...it was how the ideas and emotions conveyed in each stanza were perfectly expressed, illustrated, and juxtaposed...the intense, even exaggerated introspection that shifts from self-centered to selfless. Wonderful! (double apostrophe line 4 of stanza 2...teasing) - Dew

[dornicks]

Many thanks,Dew,for your added,enlightening comment, much valued,

dornicks

[Whiskurz]

"Am I crazy for thinking we've all lost our way
with no time for each other,so little to say
without time for 'hellos' in a rush with 'goodbyes'
so distracted by gadgets we''re pressured to buy.
Will we ever find time or a place to reflect
do we do anything for the weak and the sick
can we not see the people who live on the street
if it's not on our mind then it's under our feet."

This says it all my friend......A Great piece of writing......Whisk

[sleepingsun1]

Beautiful reflection on the removal of the individual from a societal collectivism and consummerism. It is so true we have forgotten what we all share in common, how much we can grow and learn from other people. Thank you for this.

[charbama]

Wow. I truly loved this poem.

[E.S.]

Very Good Poem!

[dornicks]

Very belated thanks for the extra comments,much valued,

dornicks

[ladylilith]

Such a solid piece of work. I thought the careful structure and wording of this made it such an absorbing read, and then taking on a more tragic tone, as a reader you can't help but feel it pulling on you. Really wonderful work. Congrats on the Spotlight!!

Lily^^

[ladymaybebaby]

Another piece I have in my bookmarked collection! Just stopping in to say a much deserved congratulations for this piece to shine in the spotlight this week!

-R
xoxo

[Ladywildalice]

Ah Vinny, this is one of my favorites of yours and I am so sorry I missed it when you posted it the first time. So I am ever grateful that the powers of TPS have posted it for honors in the Spotlight, for it does, indeed, deserve it. Congrats on the Spotlight, and all I can say is it's about time. LOL. Sue

[tangerinepie]

I am so very delighted to see this spotlighted..I adored it then and revere it now. Congrats..Tangie..

[lars]

Well done. Potent in its form.

[MBW]

Absolutely fantastically awesome.

[songofmeadow]

Thanks to the spotlight as I might not have otherwise read your poem! Sadly I believe it is a poem that ccould be adapted and read at any point in time and always be current in its message. I thought the structure particularly well suited as when read out loud there is an underlying beat that is both powerful and thematic, much enjoyed, thank you and well done mx