Patience is a "hurt you"

[SirWilliamDavis]

i don't know what you're thinking
you won't share that with me
you tell me that you're fine
...insincerely

a sudden change of tone
avoidant and terse
a far cry from the flowery
vow-anointed verse
of a mere fortnight ago

haven't you heard?
the stars are talking
of how silly, surely, this is
that you won't tell your kindred
what is wrong, or what he did
when you're aware of such vast distances,
loneliness

well i much prefer that we both speak our minds
life is far too short to snare oneself in these binds
and wasn't it you who said we ought wear our passions on-sleeve
and that it made you truly happy, just knowing i'm here
waiting for you while you,
once again,
leave

[Dew]

Outrageously wonderful...Welcome to TPS! I loved the gentle form you allowed into this rolling piece. It lay on the reader's mind like a cool blanket falling. The way you treated this delicate idea was elegant from start to finish...felt like a thought-refined by time. I really liked...magnificent! - dew

[mana]

This hits so close to home for me right now. I'm going through a scenario very similar and I've put it into words numerous times but this one tells the full story so much better. I ache with you here.

[SirWilliamDavis]

A bit of my own stream-of-thought. Glad you enjoyed.

[SirWilliamDavis]

Thank you Court; I'm finding solace in expressing my emotions here as rawly as possible.

[Jahaliel]

This was raw, vulnerable and utterly moving I found myself identifying with it and really moved. Thanks so much for sharing and congrats on the Spotlight!

[ladymaybebaby]

Wow, this is a wonderful piece and I echo the words everyone else has said before me. Welcome to TPS! Also, a big congratulations on the spotlight, it is well deserved! Looking forward to reading much more of your work!

-LMB
xoxo

[SirWilliamDavis]

Thanks everyone, and special thanks to Jahaliel for spotlighting this piece.
I appreciate all of your comments and look forward to posting as often as possible here on TPS.

[musie]

SirWilliamDavis ~Welcome to TPS! I've not read you before, and this was so well written and most deserving of both the comment's you have already received as well as the Spotlight....and if you gained some solace from the writing, that is an added plus I must say that I think the 3rd vs. was my favorite....I look forward to more from your pen....CONGRATULATIONS! Musie

[LateRabbit]

First of all congratulations on getting your work into the spotlight, very well deserved.

This is a very sincere stream of consciousness, well articulated and hits on something I know I've been a subject to before as I'm sure many others have.

The final stanza is what really drives this home for me, like a fish-hook of love, a little part of you gets ripped out when it leaves, especially when there's always the chance of it being used to catch another.

Nice write,

- LR

[Rassy48]

SWD,
I, too, will add my congrats to "The Spotlight" honor of your posting and a hearty "Welcome" to TPS. I can only echo what my TPS firends have already said. This is just a wonderful creation. I guess what stands out for me is the presentation and word usage. No big long fancy, what I call "$50.00 Words". Straight, simple, sharp and to the point with a very clear and precise message. I, too, feel the last stanza finishes this creation just perfectly. Great Job. Looking forward reading others of your creations. Congrats!
Joanne

[tangerinepie]

I also was deeply touched by this poem, told with delicacy for it's sad content.A moving spotlight selection very well deserved..TY..Tangie..

[everhopeful]

Welcome to TPS.
Dare I say that this probably represents a male perspective when the female of the species decides something is wrong, but won't let us know exactly what and why? Before I go into hiding to avoid a kicking from the women of the site, I'll add that this is a nice insightful poem which uses the straight talking medium in a way fully in keeping with the message it screams.
Congratulations on the spotlight!

[Sasha]

This is a wonderful work, and I believe we all can relate to this as said above, I love the delivery, those the words that brought deep insecure emotions, like patinece is like a last grain of sand in an hourglass, but I like the honesty and open words, that the speaker is standing by them even when they leave; that's beautiful! A lot can be taken from this.

Congratulations on the deserved Spotlight!

Sash

[flux]

I admire the flow of this poem, not only the natural sound of the poem but the easy unravelling of your thoughts. Easy to follow and enjoyed.