Composing Repetitions

An archive containing past featured spotlight works, what we consider, some of the best works on TPS. Feel free to leave comments.
Post Reply
ladylilith
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:4023
Joined:April 14th, 2012, 4:32 pm
Contact:
Composing Repetitions

Post by ladylilith » January 19th, 2013, 4:40 am

I don't do prose. Not in any universally recognised way
here, because while fine lines can make finer mistakes
I'm not sure where the line is drawn between lies and
fabricated red romance. I'm not true to my altruistic side,
my soul relies heavily on unhealthy drinks and forgotten
ambrosia. And my poetry, or prose, slips forward from time
passed perhaps. A phoenix effect? Plagiarism. Public, patient
plagiarism. But these palms press eagerly to the sullen stone
effigies, the earth ware red that depicts their faces; clumsy
expressions that I reflect as my own in a clumsy hand and
still- karma, or effect, or cause, creeps into my quick to
firelight heart, creating a bonfire that blazes long into the
night. Those glazed over eyes, warmly wondering where
the fireworks have gone, bored of my smoky light in dark-
I slowly ember on, umbered face, charcoaled hands, red-
Red lips from birth, like a lady's secret desire when licked
lightly wet. But I own a tricky tongue. Tricky, tricky, flick
from one side of my mouth to the other. No wine please,
The time for apocalypse has completely passed, thank gods.
Not one of my prayers, with hands furiously fingering beads,
Make a jot of truth or logic or beauty, to you. To me though?
They're red. Maroon maybe when I'm tired of living like a sad
and sullen old lie. Sanguine, sometimes, after huffing walks
uphill, always uphill. And still, you don't get it. I'm not her,
Nor him. I'm not a Grecian urn or a raven-black writing desk.
I have no nightingale's song nor any ode less travelled than
the one that traverses the tightly spun coil that wraps about
my mortal body. This is my temple, where the priestess and
the preacher proudly interrupt any piety or any notion of hard
graft with delicate flowers of weak appreciation, wrongly shot.

In the end, when I open my arms to meet this death in an emo-
tionally tight disguise, I can feel that my spirit will sing. Songs
of glittering triumph because yes, though I may stain my cheeks
red and callouses harden my angry hands, yes. I was here, slow-
ly dancing to a butterfly's beat. But no. No, no, I don't do prose.





___


*A/N - Lines 18-19 make reference to LateRabbit's prose piece here --> http://thepoetsanctuary.net/forum/viewt ... 25&t=21200


"The night is dark and full of terrors."

everhopeful
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:6714
Joined:April 14th, 2012, 9:21 am

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by everhopeful » January 19th, 2013, 8:32 am

Holy Prose writing, Batman! It's a pleasure seeing you in this board, writing in a way which seems true to the ideals of the form; there's a deeply personal element in terms of the speakers decree regarding personal philosophy, but it's done without losing a sense of lyricism and, more importantly, poetry. Yes, very much putting the poetry into prose poetry here.
This is a relentless read, like the proverbial 'page turner' novel, which sucked me in and held me until the very end. Too many wonderful facets to pick out every element I enjoyed, but I loved your nod toward some classics near the end of the first paragraph. I dare say this is one of my favourites from you, and there's stiff competition there, but this is truly exceptional work.



User avatar
Jahaliel
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:1995
Joined:April 14th, 2012, 6:53 pm
Location:A'divell

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by Jahaliel » January 19th, 2013, 4:42 pm

I echo everything Mick said, this is absolutely amazing. From the first line I was caught, I love the way all your ideas flow seamlessly. The alliteration in there is awesome as is that whole opening phrase. Beautiful, incredible *applauds*

p.s. Congrats on the Spotlight lovvie x


3 replies for every post

I loved you then, I love you still though we are shadows of our former glory
Though they try to kill us off, we are a never-ending story


Image

ladymaybebaby
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:5371
Joined:April 18th, 2012, 11:37 am
Location:dying in the heat and humidity that is New Orleans

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by ladymaybebaby » January 19th, 2013, 4:55 pm

A little birdie told me I should read this piece, so here I am! Jeez louise girl, what in creation inspired this latest glimpse of brillance? Oh no, you don't do prose, never in a million years! Puleez! Exalt!

-R
xoxo


Image

Dew and I want you in our posse! Just PM us!


My latest poem: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=42651

ladymaybebaby
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:5371
Joined:April 18th, 2012, 11:37 am
Location:dying in the heat and humidity that is New Orleans

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by ladymaybebaby » January 20th, 2013, 7:39 am

Congratulations on the spotlight! See previous post^^^^ . Loved this piece, bookmarked!

-R
xoxo


Image

Dew and I want you in our posse! Just PM us!


My latest poem: viewtopic.php?f=9&t=42651

BarryC
Regular Member
Regular Member
Posts:385
Joined:November 23rd, 2012, 2:55 pm

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by BarryC » January 20th, 2013, 1:26 pm

this is amazing work i must say



danielraythomason
Regular Member
Regular Member
Posts:553
Joined:April 17th, 2012, 11:18 pm
Location:Sheboygan, Wisconsin
Contact:

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by danielraythomason » January 20th, 2013, 5:38 pm

I dig this. Great work! :thumb:


Image
Image
Image

sicksoul
Regular Member
Regular Member
Posts:505
Joined:January 4th, 2013, 3:17 pm
Location:Locked out of my mind..

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by sicksoul » January 21st, 2013, 1:22 am

*face-plants her desk* Yea, you don't do prose and I'm a perfect angel :laugh:
Maybe it's just that you don't do enough prose. I'd gladly take a second serving of this, love it Lil!


Image

"Mais où sont les neiges d'antan?"
~François Villon~
Image

musie
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:2716
Joined:April 14th, 2012, 11:56 pm
Location:The Heartland

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by musie » January 21st, 2013, 7:33 am

A "second serving" that sounds good! GOOD GRIEF! this is possibly the most surreal piece I've ever seen you write...and I must echo all that has already been said about it....A BOOK MARKER for SURE my friend! SO inspiring to all writer's...PLEASE! PLEASE OWN it now...it's most deserving....CONGRATULATIONS on the Spotlight!


ImageImage

ladylilith
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:4023
Joined:April 14th, 2012, 4:32 pm
Contact:

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by ladylilith » January 21st, 2013, 7:40 am

Ok, ok! I'm owning it! See? This is me owning! I pwn n00bs..

Naw, seriously though? This was one of those writes that felt like a demon clawing its way out, for real, and afterwards I couldn't bare to look at again! So for it to be picked for the Spotlight? Gee.. It's enough to make a girl cry!

Thank you. For taking the time to read this and for leaving such heart warming and encouraging comments.

Love you xx


"The night is dark and full of terrors."

User avatar
Rassy48
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:1777
Joined:September 5th, 2012, 3:09 pm
Location:"Hiding Behind the Moon"

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by Rassy48 » January 21st, 2013, 7:41 pm

Lily,
Now I know why I don't do prose! My Lord, girl! I couldn't even come close to anything this fabulous. I just cannot even find words now to describe it. Instead of embarassing myself with some flimsy inappropriate adjectives, I will simply agree with those comments that have already been set down. I am in awe! This creation and its author are right where they belong ... "The Spotlight". Congrats, my friend.
Joanne


Writing my poetry is a passion. Reading your poetry is a privilege.

Image Image

User avatar
tangerinepie
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:4459
Joined:April 18th, 2012, 10:42 pm
Location:The North Shore

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by tangerinepie » January 22nd, 2013, 10:43 am

Lady L..you always make me feel like I should throw my quill in the fire,,,LOL...but this piece just grabs the reader and sends their senses spiraling into some unknown dimension.The beauty of it lies in the fact that your words are like no other..nor will there be another like this write..YES...EXALT...Tangie...


Image
Image

everhopeful
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:6714
Joined:April 14th, 2012, 9:21 am

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by everhopeful » January 23rd, 2013, 8:12 am

sicksoul wrote:Maybe it's just that you don't do enough prose.
^ thanks to sicksoul for expressing exactly what I tried to say to you, but she did so more eloquently!

This is a blistering piece of prose poetry and only grows more enjoyable and admirable with each further read.
Congratulations on the spotlight!



Sasha
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:2426
Joined:April 18th, 2012, 9:46 am

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by Sasha » January 24th, 2013, 3:31 am

This is one of the few pieces that makes you hang on your words, so you just read it and again, and I did read many many times. And I told you before about that, this is truly *looking for the right word*... mesmeric masterpiece of excellent poetess like you!

Congratulations on the much deserved Spotlight, sister!

Sash xx



flux
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:2427
Joined:April 15th, 2012, 12:04 pm
Location:North Wales coast.

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by flux » January 25th, 2013, 9:55 am

Reading this is like trekking through dense jungle, banana leaf, banana leaf, flower, bird, banana leaf, snake! banana leaf......you get the idea. I felt overcome by the end but this is a fine example of pouring everything onto the page and letting things find their own place.


Make fellow poets happy and comment on their poems.



ImageImageImageImage

User avatar
Rosella
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:1104
Joined:April 18th, 2012, 8:25 am

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by Rosella » January 25th, 2013, 9:40 pm

You don't do prose, neither do I! Prose writing wasn't my best. :) Ladylith, that was great writing. Exalt!



CrypticCricker
Regular Member
Regular Member
Posts:117
Joined:January 1st, 2013, 10:22 pm

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by CrypticCricker » January 27th, 2013, 2:27 am

Intense, compelling, relentlessly pulling you in...I wish I were in a smoke-filled cavern bar where the spotlight is starkly white as seen through the bluish haze, and all of the crowd is listening to you rip into our consciousness with these lines you have penned. well done!


I'd never belong to any organization that would have me as a member. Groucho Marx

Taher
Regular Member
Regular Member
Posts:30
Joined:April 24th, 2012, 9:34 pm

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by Taher » February 1st, 2013, 9:33 pm

Wow. Absolutely stunning.



musie
Elite Member
Elite Member
Posts:2716
Joined:April 14th, 2012, 11:56 pm
Location:The Heartland

Re: Composing Repetitions

Post by musie » February 3rd, 2013, 8:41 am

Does not surprise me one bit that this came to be in the Hall of Fame! CONGRATS Ladylilith! :thumb: :heart: :smile:


ImageImage

Post Reply