I Was Not Quiet (MATURE)

[Chelle]

I Was Not Quiet

As I slip the bullet into the barrel and c--- it
I think of all the times I was quiet

I was quiet when they laughed at me
I walked right by their stares
I was quiet when they tripped me
Just because I had blue hair

I was quiet
Alone and Afraid
I was quiet
Sitting by myself on the bus

I was quiet when the quarterback kicked me
I laid there, my stomach heaving
I was quiet the day she told me sorry
That night she had to wash her hair

I was quiet
Denied and Betrayed
I was quiet
Going to the concert solo

I was quiet when the teacher told me
He said I'd never be anything
I was quiet as I saw my mother
Being pulled away by HRS

I was quiet
Slain and Dismayed
I was quiet
Growing up without love

Well now it's time to speak
I walk right through the doors
I speak so loud she screams
The girl that falls to the floor

I'm not quiet
Righteous and Respected
I'm not quiet
I pull the trigger again

It's time to speak again, my friends
His eyes roll back into his head
I speak so loud he bleeds
No more touchdown passes

I'm not quiet
Controlled and Collected
I'm not quiet
I smile when they take me away

For one day I could speak
And I hope they all heard it
The day that I wasn't quiet
Spoken with the true voice of one
Hated, humiliated
But always patient

[ravendown]

Breathtakingly powerful with the heat and raw emotion in these words, very well penned and greatly enjoyed.
thank you for sharing.

Respect,
raven

[Whiskurz]

Chelle, it's not very often that I have gotten to read one of your pieces....but it was well worth the wait.....Bravo my friend......Whisk

[musie]

Hi Chelle...I have to agree with whoever it was said that this was such a "powerful write" Jammed packed with emotion's of all kind's....Anger, sadness, low-self-worth and esteem...I could not help but think of the boy's at Columbine when that tragedy struck...the bullying is so bad, and then we wonder why we have so many kid's committing suicide and or killing other's.....This was an exceptional piece from your pen and a treasure to read as tragic as the subject matter is....Thank you for sharing....Musie

[Dew]

Chilling account...at times I thought 'they should have thought about what they were doing'...but toward the end I remembered...many of us endure pain and hardship, even at an early age...but we don't all go on a killing spree...so I know there is a personal responsibility to. Made me think...great way to bring this tragic issue to the front...very well written! - Dew

[Sasha]

Woah! that really hit me hard. Powerful and effective to the max. and loaded with such intense emotions. I so love the repetition of 'I was quiet' as it made this piece powerful in its expression and that twist at the end.
Great Work!!

Sasha

[SwingingPistol]

This is tragic, chilling, and everything inbetween. I don't think love is the right word to say how I feel about this poem, sounding inappropriate, but I will say that I think you did an excellent job penning such a fragile and throat burning topic. Well done, and thank you for the read.

[Pinta77]

I saw a poem by the site owner, so I assumed it would be good. It was far beyond good...

When I first started reading, I thought this was going to be about suicide, but then they pulled the trigger again. Again!? Then for me, it went from one kind of sad to a completely different kind of sad. You really have to be pushed hard to do something like that just because you've been hurt.

Thank you Chelle. It was a nice treat to read this :)

[Lebo]

a RAW emotional journey... Keeping quiet is so universal. I speak out these days but growing up I kept silent a lot of the time. Can relate to the feelings that pop off the page..
L ebo

[Chelle]

Thanks folks for your kind comments. I had a friend from Littleton, Colorado named Logan who was a few years ahead of the guys who did the shooting thank goodness. I know that people sometimes do things for the wrong reasons. It's sad they feel the need to get attention but there are other ways to do it. You don't have to hurt others just because you have been hurt.

[everhopeful]

Although this is an older poem, it's a desperately sad coincidence for it to reappear at a time when there have been much publicised tragedies in the States, especially as the message I took from this before seeing your reply comment was how tragic it is that people can suffer so much in life that when the explode into a scream, they take a life with it.
Violence and abuse can lead to a victim becoming a violent abuser, and the seeds of tragedy can be sown long, long before it happens.

[ladymaybebaby]

My thoughts exactly EH! Since all of the chic and trendy lines have already been said, here is a simple well done on such a trending topic these days. I love the up turn of your voice in this piece! A great read, and I'm pretty sure it's only the second or third time I have read anything from your pen! Much enjoyed and I'm glad I found this gem! Thanks for sharing this story!

-LMB
xoxo

[YoursTrulyZsa]

Powerful and pointed...very nice Chelle. What an expressive write about a very terrible situation.

Zsa

[jwesley]

powerful and compelling read, my friend. And I totally agree with your comment . . . there are other ways. But when you're the object of such attention - sometimes, the world better watch out!

good write...

j.

[SirFleshwound]

This explores a state of mind from an angle we may not normally expect. The tragedy of this is that there are a legion of the disaffected and abused in this world, that resort in despair to unspeakable acts. The strength and gift of this piece is that it removes the senselessness of such acts and at least explains them. It also humanises the perpetrator, who is just as much a victim. Brave and topical.

Michael

[AgentofChaos]

you have always been able to deliver Chelle - since the old forum - your style, the build up is all sympathy, all empathy and then boom, the twist ... and even then, we can see a perspective that is so common and at most times not understood, what prompted this action / reaction.
powerful writing. I love it.
I imagine listening to Youth of the Nation by POD.

[Ladywildalice]

Well, here I am late to the Ball, the last one in line and all the tickets have been sold. But I fell upon this piece and just couldn't pass it by. We do make our own monsters in this world, don't we? And when out of the deepest need for survival that Monster turns on us, why do we even question why? Chelle, this is excellent and much, much appreciated. Very lasting impression from these words.

[Sasha]

A very worthy message to take from this. I would to describe as gradual growing/dying intensity, gorwing with "I was quite" and slowly dying as "I'm not quiet" till the end. Some brula images were thrown effectively in the beginning, it's like the speaker is fed up with past memories and needs to breathe air of freedom for once, but indeed, there are many ways to do, either through a good or bad way.
Powerful valuable message and delivery, and worthy Spotlight. Congratulations!

Sash

[ladymaybebaby]

Just stopping back in for another read and to say congratulations on the spotlight pick of the week, it is much deserved!

-R
xoxo

[inflames]

Love this Chelle. There's an emotion for everyone in here. Thanks for sharing this and congrats on the spotlight!