Spider

[Farkas]

The bee drank in the sweet, sweet nectar
He drank and drank until he could drink no more
He slipped from the blossom onto the planter
The bee was unable to fly as he did before

He wallowed in a warm, sensual euphoria
Sporadic images flooded his senses with an elemental nightmare
An insidious numbness held him in a monstrous jaw
The screaming in his mind melted into deaths icy stare

[Ladywildalice]

OMG.....I loved this. How true that like this bee, we often imbibe on the things that bring us pleasure, to the point of insidious numbness..........smoking...........alcohol...........drugs...................sex............it all becomes elemental nightmares, holding us in its monstrous jaws as we melt into death's icy stare. Excellent and such astute insight. Well done. Thanks.

[ladylilith]

I really enjoyed the language you chose for this piece. It's got this lulling effect which moves quietly into a place that is more sinister, if that makes sense? Great phrasing, it's a compelling read!

Lily^^

[True~Reflection]

I really enjoyed the metaphor you presented here. How we are so alike the bumble bee, lured by our desires until we eventually just cannot pull away and it becomes our undoing. I thought the way you presented this as a simplistic piece really added an extra layer of depth. As if it just simply is. The image that the spider portrayed was also well taken. I couldn't help but associate it with death. Very well done piece.

[AuroraRayne]

I like where the comments went above, and agree with them as well. To be a in the situation of indulgence and get caught in a web like that, you must still be a tough cookie since bees are really good at getting out of a spiders web. It is always fun to watch a spider try to catch a bee.

[dwells]

Indeed, "everything in moderation" (Ben Franklin). Much enjoyed this tale Farkas as it had a very parable or perhaps fable feel to it, cheers! (I don't like spiders since I got bitten by a brown recluse - poor bee)

[sombers_eye]

I just watched a talk about the importance of bees in the world. It was pretty striking. And your poem is the poetic version of it. Awe-inspiring images here!

[ladymaybebaby]

First congratulations on the spotlight pick of the week, it is well deserved! Love the skill with which you turned this one around on a dime. This is a great use of metaphor and in a shorter piece like this one your skill is totally on display and you rocked it! So well done... I am a true sucker for a great ending and this one delivers! Congrats again! Well done and I'm glad I got to read this gem!

-LMB
xoxo

[JASON]

a lot of truth in these 8 lines - overindulgence reaping it's just reward...
congratulations on a smart little story.

[LorettaYoung]

Farkas: Congratulations; your poem is very poignant; wonderful metaphor keeps you feeling for the poor bee; then extends the thought to all of us. Best Loretta

[Jennywasafriend]

I am reminded of infidelity and divorce in this piece. And wonderful brew of imagery. Congrats!

[devious83]

This is superb, and I love minimalist work.
Congrats on the spotlight.