Empty Life

[azisnomarsa]

They should sting like thorns of wild flowers
When you aimlessly wander through a field at night
They should lift you up above the mountain tops
Like wings of an angel given you for a day

But when they only mildly scratch the surface
Never going deeper, leaving pink instead of red
And when they only let you jump above two heads in front
Still missing the show, now with swollen ankles

Then you start to internalize the guilts
Tripping over assumtions of faith
Keeling over the weight of the world
Kneeling in front of an altar of pills

And no one knows how it gets started
Or really how to end it the best way
We live with dullness like old kitchen knives
Rusting slowly in your childhood cupboard

Expect nothing in return when you show up empty handed
Dealer shuffled the deck and dealt you ziltch
Ship has sailed away to Arcadia and beyond
We're still back here, waiting for a bus

Just keeping our feet planted firm
Sticking to excuses learner by trial
Every day is the same old, same old
No joy or sadness, only same old

[amaranthus]

Perfect title. I absolutely love the third stanza, which for me, clinched the whole piece together. Lots of people do not understand how difficult life can be when it's the same old, same old. Or as I say ssdd-same s*** different day. Well penned.

[Casmatori]

I love the metaphor "Dealer shuffled the deck and dealt you zilch" - such a powerful line. Amazing job.

[candlewitch]

hello,

potent stuff, this:

Then you start to internalize the guilts
Tripping over assumtions of faith
Keeling over the weight of the world
Kneeling in front of an altar of pills

And no one knows how it gets started
Or really how to end it the best way
We live with dullness like old kitchen knives
Rusting slowly in your childhood cupboard

amazing imagery and language usage!
always, Cat

[AoR]

"Expect nothing in return when you show up empty handed
Dealer shuffled the deck and dealt you ziltch
Ship has sailed away to Arcadia and beyond
We're still back here, waiting for a bus"

There are a lot of fantastic lines and metaphors. The biting quips are stinging with terrific tact and knowing. I love the clever word play, the visuals and similes are very fresh, unique and really get the brain thinking. Very fascinating and filled with lots of epiphany and truth. The last stanza is ace!

[jsol]

I really enjoyed this poem.

[Josie]

This was a descriptive poem of depression. If you don't expect anything from life, probably you will miss opportunities coming your way. If all you can see are others moving toward hope, aboard the ship heading to Arcadia and someone else dealing the deck of cards, the spirit is downcast and feeling powerless. You painted the life of the Narrator as one who even if he were barefoot in a forest at night, he would hardly even feel the thorns. He is numb to pain. Narrator recognizes others like himself who do not see the way out of living a humdrum life, probably bumping elbows with them. "We live with dullness, like old kitchen knives' and 'We're still back here, waiting for the bus.' This was a mood painting poem. Congratulations on the TPS Spotlight.

[inflames]

The final stanza is beautiful. Great poem here. Congrats on the spotlight!