Food Poisoning
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Food Poisoning
I’m bout to riot, I can no longer stay quiet, forget a diet
I’ll no longer buy it unless I can fry it
Won’t find me hunched over doin crunches
I just wanna know when lunch is
I pay no heed to the naughty or raunchy
Got no need for images of the p-----
Just pass me fries covered in a ranch sea
And cheese please, that’s all I need to be orgasmic
I’m attack my organs with a Big Mac, F’ organic
Pour on the salt… and battered doesn’t matter to me, its food artistry
Should fish & chips be considered assault and battery to my arteries
Harding, hardly I’m still eating large at Hardy’s
I’ve no interest in easy chick’s see or chickpeas
I prefer images of greasy Krispy Kreme to lick and tease
Please, fill me with coffee and sorbet I’ll absorb it
I admit my size is so morbid, I can be seen from orbit
Don’t omit it, put the aerial view in my obit
Oh and please bury me with that KFC, so succulent
When my heart gets stuck and I kick the bucket
I’m bout to riot, I can no longer stay quiet, forget a diet
I’ll no longer buy it unless I can fry it
Won’t find me hunched over doin crunches
I just wanna know when lunch is
I pay no heed to the naughty or raunchy
Got no need for images of the p-----
Just pass me fries covered in a ranch sea
And cheese please, that’s all I need to be orgasmic
I’m attack my organs with a Big Mac, F’ organic
Pour on the salt… and battered doesn’t matter to me, its food artistry
Should fish & chips be considered assault and battery to my arteries
Harding, hardly I’m still eating large at Hardy’s
I’ve no interest in easy chick’s see or chickpeas
I prefer images of greasy Krispy Kreme to lick and tease
Please, fill me with coffee and sorbet I’ll absorb it
I admit my size is so morbid, I can be seen from orbit
Don’t omit it, put the aerial view in my obit
Oh and please bury me with that KFC, so succulent
When my heart gets stuck and I kick the bucket
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Re: Food Poisoning
Amen!
Haha, such a funny piece of poetry, I really cracked up at the line "I admit my size is so morbid, I can be seen from orbit"! This, much like some of the food described, is a guilty pleasure poem, in that I know I shouldn't laugh, and should probably take a look at my own eating habits, but instead it just makes me want to go out and eat something completely unhealthy! I like how you play upon the sexual symbolism too, and the word play of "I’ve no interest in easy chick’s see or chickpeas" was another fun facet of your work.
A feel good read, even though it shouldn't be lol
Haha, such a funny piece of poetry, I really cracked up at the line "I admit my size is so morbid, I can be seen from orbit"! This, much like some of the food described, is a guilty pleasure poem, in that I know I shouldn't laugh, and should probably take a look at my own eating habits, but instead it just makes me want to go out and eat something completely unhealthy! I like how you play upon the sexual symbolism too, and the word play of "I’ve no interest in easy chick’s see or chickpeas" was another fun facet of your work.
A feel good read, even though it shouldn't be lol
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Re: Food Poisoning
Thanks Everhopeful! It was fun doing a piece as "serious" as this, but with a light hearted (ha ha pun) pen stroke when I did it. my eating habits are not that great, but I try...
DJK-- Yeah I splurge now and again...and again...and ummm maybe again even. lol
DJK-- Yeah I splurge now and again...and again...and ummm maybe again even. lol
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Re: Food Poisoning
HAHA
I don't know whether to go for the nearest trash can and hurl.... or the nearest fast food place and order everything on the menu. Delicious or disgusting? This reminds me of Jim Gaffigans comedy skit where he spends like 40 minutes talking about nothing but food... and acting like it's a "naughty" thing.
"I admit my size is so morbid, I can be seen from orbit
Don’t omit it, put the aerial view in my obit"
Even funnier knowing that you're proud of it! This was like a roller coaster ride, instead of screaming I was eating... not such a good idea when you think about it...
Hilarious stuff... keep it up!
~TIMOTHY~
I don't know whether to go for the nearest trash can and hurl.... or the nearest fast food place and order everything on the menu. Delicious or disgusting? This reminds me of Jim Gaffigans comedy skit where he spends like 40 minutes talking about nothing but food... and acting like it's a "naughty" thing.
"I admit my size is so morbid, I can be seen from orbit
Don’t omit it, put the aerial view in my obit"
Even funnier knowing that you're proud of it! This was like a roller coaster ride, instead of screaming I was eating... not such a good idea when you think about it...
Hilarious stuff... keep it up!
~TIMOTHY~
Re: Food Poisoning
It flowed better than anything i've read on this site thus far.
i like it very much.
i like it very much.
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Re: Food Poisoning
Smiles and chuckles while reading this creative master piece, fun write and clever as usual from you Wounded, highly enjoyed.
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Re: Food Poisoning
food poisoning is no fun especially when you almost die from it
but all things in modertion especially fried food
but all things in modertion especially fried food
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Re: Food Poisoning
Hey an excellent write! For me, this had a boom-bap, hip hoppy style. Similar in both subject matter and rhythm to Time's "Corn Syrup Smile". Humour and sarcasm was used in manner that made me cackle. Yes I to love a bit of grease in the arteries... I think we all do... Which made this poem all the more relatable.
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Re: Food Poisoning
Love the rhymes, flow and the twisted connection between food and lust. That puts a whole meaning to: breasts or thighs?
It's certainly food of thought for gastronomical readers, poetical eaters and everyone inbetween.
Great job, my friend!
It's certainly food of thought for gastronomical readers, poetical eaters and everyone inbetween.
Great job, my friend!
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Re: Food Poisoning
WOW! I go away for a couple days and BOOM! Comment explosions! Thank you all! I am humbled and grateful for each and everyone taking the time to read AND comment here!
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Re: Food Poisoning
lol......I couldn't have said it better myself I told my wife to bury me with her meatloaf....of course the first time she cooked it it almost poisoned me......Great piece my friend.......Whisk
Whether a Gift or a Curse, We Write!
Thank you for your comments!
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Re: Food Poisoning
Congrats on the Spotlight WA and it's not nice to kick the colonel's bucket! One of the most humorous offerings I've read on TPS or anywhere for that matter (and I've read a lot). Hoping some of the Americanisms carry across the pond for all to gain a proper appreciation of just how good this was, cheers!
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Re: Food Poisoning
This was HILARIOUS.
Loved it. A lot.
Loved it. A lot.
The darkest past cannot extinguish the light of the brightest future.-Shane Wells
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Re: Food Poisoning
Well, that's... hehe.
I so like the subtle rhyme and rhythm this has, like along with ideas, you have this rhythm going on making it such a fun read. I like as well the clever play on images and words, and you did it seamlessly, and it's just crazy when we don't care about the consequences when it comes to guilty pleasure.
Witty work - Congratulations on the Spotlight!
Sash
I so like the subtle rhyme and rhythm this has, like along with ideas, you have this rhythm going on making it such a fun read. I like as well the clever play on images and words, and you did it seamlessly, and it's just crazy when we don't care about the consequences when it comes to guilty pleasure.
Witty work - Congratulations on the Spotlight!
Sash
- miharu
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Re: Food Poisoning
"Please, fill me with coffee and sorbet I’ll absorb it"
I loved the flow and punch and rhyme of this line. And interesting, if disturbing (in a talented, poetic way!) piece. I love seeing unique things in the spotlight, and this definitely fits the unique qualification!
I loved the flow and punch and rhyme of this line. And interesting, if disturbing (in a talented, poetic way!) piece. I love seeing unique things in the spotlight, and this definitely fits the unique qualification!
- QuietAstronomer
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Re: Food Poisoning
Wow. This piece so resonates with me as my doc (she is a red head no less) told me to lose thirty pounds from my existent 184.
All I'm eatting is veggies and Nutella.
No sugar, no carbs.
NOT the way I wanted to go.
Congrats on the Spotlight.
QA
All I'm eatting is veggies and Nutella.
No sugar, no carbs.
NOT the way I wanted to go.
Congrats on the Spotlight.
QA
Three for one will get it done.
(Three Comments per Post kidlets.)
(Three Comments per Post kidlets.)