Blackest Black

[continuation]

The shadows snatch me
Steal me away
Come too quickly;
My vision a sudden blur
Then, black

No matter how I claw,
For the door
Of the dungeon where I'm kept
I'm forgotten and lost,
To the dark wakefulness

It only brings broken heartedness,
As a midnight snack for the insomniac,
Lurking inside my cell
Starved each eve
In pursuit of contentment he slaves

Merciless murk-
That in which I wallow
A hard to swallow pill of peace
Gives me short term relief,
From the demons within my thoughts

The war I wage with beasts beyond control
Colliding head on with one another,
Until consciousness begins to drift...
My vision a sudden blur
Then, black

[Cedeines]

Powerful and raw. "a midnight snack for the insomniac", wow...

[allmirth]

This has a sense of relentless circularity that is heartbreaking, yet, compelling.

Thanks much for sharing.
Mirthy

[dornicks]

A dark write, with some good lines and phrases used to describe the overall feeling. It's not uncommon and many will recognise the symptoms. Thank you for sharing,

dornicks

[linlin528]

I can relate, you described it perfectly. Keep it up!

[everhopeful]

The 'midnight snack for the insomniac' line caught my eye too, although the poem as a whole had a claustrophobic and relentless feeling of something more violent than the literal darkness. What I liked was how you played upon the sense of touch in the second and third stanzas, which emphasised the idea of not being able to see clearly and relying on other senses.
You've managed to subtly personify and bring form to a feeling here, one which feels quite brutally oppressive, and the clever bookending of the repeated lines in the opening and closing stanzas were another smart poetic touch in a poem which screamed in pain. This one really aches.

[rupertpupkin]

Lovely write and most deserving of a spotlight. Dark and oppressive. Loved it

[Josie]

Whether the loss of sight is physical or spiritual, it is an exhausting event. One's clear vision is sorely missed when one's sight is blurred and fading into darkness. I liked the way the first and last stanza ended with 'Then, black'.