Remembering

[jaievieenrose]

Is there any sanity in silence?
The river laid still tonight,
it's gentle tide lacking your fervor,
skimming the shores you promised to return to.
Here where forgotten waves come to rest
I sat to gather the reflections long passed
The stars soft countenance lost in moonlight
searching for the deserted banks of time
where lovers cast their laments into the sea
and the current carries them here for us to find.

[dwells]

Hi Jai!
This was imbued with so many feelings that the reader becomes swept away in silent reminiscence. Something significant for everyone, at any level, on a cool, blue scale of emotions. I always and automatically love an extended marine metaphor, and this was special for me too. The closing was just astounding - cheers and well done! - Dan

[scribble]

Dan said it better, but I, too, am a sucker for oceanic imagery. The soft rise and fall is well captured. Brings me back to "Dover Beach" (an old favorite).

[Versus]

I am not a sadist but I like very much your poem about lost love.

[jaievieenrose]

Thanks for everyone's kind comments

Dwells, I was really struggling with the ending for a while, so I'm touched it moved you

Love Jaie

[Balustrade]

Lines 3 and 4 are stunning. They had such a great impact on me. They say so much, as does this whole piece. I appreciate your flowing style and salute the loaded sentiments within.

[nightseas]

Usually, I disagree with the poems given the spotlight, on a weekly basis. I'm always like, "What are they thinking?! My stuff was like x100000000000000000 times more fire than that!!! CONSPIRACY!!!!!! POPULARITY CONTEST!!!!!!"

But I have to say, you deserve this. That is one of the best poems, if not THE best, I've read from someone else on this site. I went through it trying to find the oh-so-common mistakes people start making in lack of fire once they begin a poem, but I couldn't find anything I could point to and say "AHA!"

You beautifully went from one symbol to another, tying all that imagery impeccably and with true, deep meaning. You even make the reader think through it to understand, which is something so many others lack.

I usually dislike old style poems, but this here slapped me across the face and reminded me of what they can do, when done right.

I don't always drink old-style, but when I do, it's jaievieenrose.

As to the moderators, you finally got it right. *resentful sigh*

[micky74007]

I really like this poem. Beautifully written. The first line is superb. As I read this over and over, I hear the soft melodies of the Righteous Brothers in the backround. This is one of my favorite poems I've read on this site.

[jaievieenrose]

nightseas, micky, thank you both for such sweet words.
it's been so long since I've felt compelled to write, I am pleased that it is resonating with others.

Jaie