...how to stay (or leave).

[BlueConniption]

…how to stay (or leave).


You -

like the pensive, calculated waves of
that April concerto, still evade -
escape through sixteen years of
accordion space (and goodbyes).

Dripping echoes within
hollow moments of time, collect in
rhythmic puddles, the
soft. steady. showers
of Spring and conjure images of

nimbus-cloaked Sun, a
daisy-filled mind - you
conducting the wind
and I,
lying captivated by your side.

We floated effortlessly above
the reeds – sometimes. (Fear
still gathering in lethargic drafts, a
steely rotation behind the brownest
sad eyes.)

A single, lithe petal still lilts
nearby
with every strange breeze, interrupted -
never having quite learned…

[miharu]

I love the juxtaposition of the "accordion space" and the idea of a regal orchestra that the earlier "concerto" puts in the reader's mind. The musical theme is emphasized in the staccato beat of the "steady showers" and is artfully woven into the conducting of wind. The turn at the end is almost unexpected, of the flower who is unable to follow along... although the foreshadowing provided by the word "pensive" (a tremulous sense of insecurity) is brought to completion in these final lines.

Lovely write, I really enjoyed being carried along for the read!

[rupertpupkin]

Hi. I think the final line did it for me. Such a wonderful ending to a beautiful and well written piece. Loved it.

[rupertpupkin]

Hi. Well done with this most deserving spotlight for a wonderful poem.

[BlueConniption]

Thank you very much! ☺ I truly appreciate your comments, miharu and rupert. Thanks to everyone else for reading.

[Sassafras]

Ver nice! The flow and the transitions are so smooth and it was very easy to get caught up in the imagery and to be in the poem. Absolutely lovely piece!

[miharu]

I'm so happy that this piece was chosen for spotlight. It is very uniquely written!

On this second reread, I found myself most relating to the wayward petal in the end, trying so hard to keep rhythm yet interrupted by the breeze...