Nature

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courtly
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Re: Nature

Post by courtly » March 2nd, 2018, 7:28 pm

This is a complex, interesting poem. The sense of a threatening, endless journey is effective. I also really liked the part with 'heaven and hell,' etc. These are all relevant religious themes, which have the poem seem somewhat significant. However, you might wish to clarify what is 'between' these things: the speaker or the storm?

The themes are quite interesting. This poem seems explicitly to deal with complex, general themes. This is of interest, it also seems slightly unique here.

They seem to accept the 'storm,' ultimately. You could display this turn more clearly, through explicitly noting that the storm which was threatening is now allowed for. Otherwise, they seem fearful, then accept it, however with no clear mention of the original fear being dealt with.

However, if they are called 'opposites,' then why do you later say that they do not 'oppose' the other? You could use a less specific word, like 'fight,' or 'struggle with.' This portrayal does seem slightly reminiscent of Blake.

It still feels slightly anti-climactic to end your poem with a sort of homage, after all of its attempt at complex development. Perhaps placing the 'tiger' part earlier - if you need it - could help it feel like you conclude your piece in your own voice.

You might have meant 'desert,' not 'dessert.' Also, 'mingled,' rather than 'mingeld.'

This was quite interesting, thanks.



CarolynKleefeld
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Re: Nature

Post by CarolynKleefeld » March 2nd, 2018, 10:47 pm

Beautiful blending of opposites and a powerful transcendence of duality-- masterfully and insightfully composed; philosophically intriguing and much enjoyed.



Christopher11
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Re: Nature

Post by Christopher11 » July 8th, 2018, 10:27 am

From our perspective, Nature can appear to have a bizarre way of balancing things. And, when it seems to discriminate without care, we often struggle to understand why.
Very much enjoyed!
David


FAITH

anthonycoll
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Re: Nature

Post by anthonycoll » July 8th, 2018, 11:08 am

As the man said, "It is what it is!" And then the song, "I beg your pardon, I didn't promise you a rose garden!" A loving Heavenly Father provided us a mixed environment so that we could grow and become stronger to meet the challenges that lay ahead in eternity - if we so desire!!! C. S. Lewis in his book Mere Christianity alludes to this somewhat. Enjoyed your writings. Thanks for sharing, anthony



Philip16
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Re: Nature

Post by Philip16 » July 8th, 2018, 3:18 pm

To me, this is a poem about acceptance, about acknowledging the storms and the presence of opposites but
facing this with the declaration that "in the eye of the storm i will find at peace
Because you be there the life of my heart

The one who made the Tiger
also made me"


Beautiful visuals to illustrate your message.
Wonderfully constructed poem.

Phillip16


Remember, in order to facilitate community development, comment on 3 poems for every one that you post.

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