This Quiet Town

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micky74007
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This Quiet Town

Post by micky74007 » July 30th, 2016, 12:22 pm

This Quiet Town

All the lights are out in this quiet town;
The streets are dead in silence.
Every window is shuttered, every shutter locked;
Each door is barred to the misty night.
Wrapped in blankets and warmed by coats
The people huddle in the dark.
No fire burns in any hearth,
No flame, no sound to welcome her.
Her footsteps scrape across the cobblestones,
Her pounding rattles the heavy door.
"Jeremiah, let me in." He voice is cracked and aged.
"It's Elsa, dear, your wife."
But Elsa's dead, sunk freshly in the ground.
She pounds again at the silent house
Then wanders off.
The tinkle of a bell is her next approach,
And in a child's voice she calls--
"Mommy, please let me in, it's cold."
"Our son," his mother gasps
And moves to free the lock.
Her husband holds her tight. "Our boy is gone
"He won't be back."
Each door in town she hammers at;
Each time silence meets her knock.
With coming dawn, her substance growing thin,
She scratches at a worried house--
"Won't someone let me in?"



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Ona Sabela
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Re: This Quiet Town

Post by Ona Sabela » July 30th, 2016, 11:54 pm

Deliciously dark and eerie, it feels like the start of an amazing story I would love to hear more about!


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candlewitch
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Re: This Quiet Town

Post by candlewitch » July 31st, 2016, 10:33 am

hello!

I, like ona sabela, would love to hear more!!! spooky, yet sad and compelling. good work!

always, Cat


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dwells
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Re: This Quiet Town

Post by dwells » August 7th, 2016, 9:57 pm

The bewitched old crone, of those who have gone beyond, and won't be coming home - though she will knock. Guessing that worried house in the finale might be her own maybe? Reminds me of a parable I can't quite recall of one condemned to roam; seeking sustenance and perhaps atonement. Cheers Micky and welcome to the underbelly of TPS :)
Enjoyed this one especially for the mood created with words - Dan


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