Honourable Discharge.
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He walks through the streets
like a shadow in clothing
through rivers of people
all to-ing and fro-ing
with singular thoughts
of today and tomorrow
some smiling inside
others heavy with sorrow
most blind to the shape
that is swimming between them
a handful pretending
they don't even see him.
He struggles upstream
like he has no tomorrow
this wreck of a man
who was yesterday's hero
in battle fatigues
that are dirty and tattered
the look on his face saying
none of that mattered
with the demons inside
navigating his flow
he's a man on a mission
with nowhere to go.
The shells are exploding
the bullets are flying
around him his comrades
are screaming and dying
some calling for Jesus
and others their mothers
but like a good trooper
with no time to bother
he must soldier on
'till the mission's accomplished
it's only come darkness
his battle is finished.
The vaccines administered
for his protection
are lodged in his brain
with no hope of rejection
they've muddled his thoughts
and have stolen his reason
have bolted the door
to both time and the season
his name and his number
are all that remain,
what a handsome reward
for his service and pain.
like a shadow in clothing
through rivers of people
all to-ing and fro-ing
with singular thoughts
of today and tomorrow
some smiling inside
others heavy with sorrow
most blind to the shape
that is swimming between them
a handful pretending
they don't even see him.
He struggles upstream
like he has no tomorrow
this wreck of a man
who was yesterday's hero
in battle fatigues
that are dirty and tattered
the look on his face saying
none of that mattered
with the demons inside
navigating his flow
he's a man on a mission
with nowhere to go.
The shells are exploding
the bullets are flying
around him his comrades
are screaming and dying
some calling for Jesus
and others their mothers
but like a good trooper
with no time to bother
he must soldier on
'till the mission's accomplished
it's only come darkness
his battle is finished.
The vaccines administered
for his protection
are lodged in his brain
with no hope of rejection
they've muddled his thoughts
and have stolen his reason
have bolted the door
to both time and the season
his name and his number
are all that remain,
what a handsome reward
for his service and pain.
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
What an impactful piece of poetry, this is so incredibly relentless that it takes the breath away to consider someone trapped in a living hell. There are parts of this which suggest an element of post traumatic stress, yet I was also struck by the impact of the medication used for the soldiers benefit which only led to later problems. Perhaps even more striking is how solitary a life it is for this soldier, left isolated now they're back in civvies, and how their service has ruined their chance of a normal life.
A blistering, emotive read.
A blistering, emotive read.
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
You have captured the moment and metality perfetctly. Thank you for sharing this piece!
"A professional makes his work play, and his play practice."
Soldierpoet's Archive
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Soldierpoet's Archive
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
This is such powerful writing about a subject I've tried to address myself in the past.The format lends itself perfectly to the hellish existence of PTSD,in the way your words are unrelenting (as everhopeful described it).A torrent of brilliantly chosen words.
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- tangerinepie
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
My friend..If this isn't spotlighted I will have a conniption.I am book marking this in my heart, for I just feel teary again, and why must you always do this to me..[I forgive you though because to even say one word about this unbelievable poem would be sacrosanct..It's richness and texture so poignant..Tangie..
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
Nice writing. A service man who served and now doesn't know how to live again. Seems to be a reoccurring theme with them. I had a choice to go to college or serve my country and I choose the former. I was always leery of signing my life away. Though I feel I am not in a better spot I do feel the pain and anguish one must feel. Thank you for sharing.
"It will not always be this way. I have the power to change things and I do my best everyday to make it better than the last"
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
Many of the men in my family have sesrved in different wars..one cousin you depicted almost exactly with this description...and reading it makes me think again of him and I feel tears forming..Nice write..Valentine
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- tangerinepie
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
Hi there, I am so thrilled about this, that I think I will have a sweet sip of dandelion wine..All the best my friend on a poem that will resonate forever..Tangie..
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
Beautiful work, my friend! I'm sorry I somehow missed this one the first go round... thank goodness for second chances! Truly spotlight worthy! Congratulations on a most deserved honor to shine!
-LMB
xoxo
-LMB
xoxo
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
Well deserved dornicks , A relentless pushing through to make its statement, flowing yet jabbing at the same time. "... a shadow in clothing", " ... a man on a mission with nowhere to go.", great stuff, the stuff of poetry.
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"...whatever things are - true, whatever things are - noble, whatever things are - pure, whatever things are - lovely , whatever things are - of good report, if there is any - virtue and if there is anything to praise - think on these things."
Paul the Apostle, A.D.60-62.
Paul the Apostle, A.D.60-62.
- songofmeadow
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
A poem conspicuous for its deft and relentless handling and delivery, I may have held my breath while reading. Thank you to the spotlight pickets for highlighting this one mx
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- Josie
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
This is definitely a poem that needed to be shared. Kudos for the spotlight recognition.
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
Even upon re-reading this one I was struck by how quickly the words take over and we are thrown into the former soldier's shoes. Life really seems to be slipping away from him, and the imagery of the opening, comparing the world to being caught in riptide, set up the traumatic feeling perfectly. The fate of him is something I couldn't wish on my worst enemy, so to know people genuinely pay this price for serving the country is a bitter pill to swallow.
A brilliant piece of poetry, congratulations on the spotlight!
A brilliant piece of poetry, congratulations on the spotlight!
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
Wow. This is beautiful and heartwrenching. The words really grasp you and make you read them quickly and forcefully. You really get thrust into the message of this poem. COngrats on your spotlight!
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
This really shook me. Such a heartwrenching write. Congrats on the spotlight!
- Larsen M. Callirhoe
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
I like how you described PTSD. A soldier's life is hard and they are young with the world ahead of them. I wonder how service life distorts some youths life making them grow up with a bad outlook on life leading to PTSD. You depicted the life of a soldier very well I might add. I got a general discharge after getting drunk one night. Never told my parents why I got out of the service after one year of service. I got out like I was never in the service and you described to a tee how I felt after I got out. For that reason I think this is a brilliant write because you capture the essence of young soldiers sentiments perfect after they are discharged. Congrats on the spotlight.
victor
victor
Victor Mike Lash~
Larsen M. Callirhoe~
All My Poetry Works
Miscellaneous Pieces:
Visions of My Sanity.
Wrestling Gods
Larsen M. Callirhoe~
All My Poetry Works
Miscellaneous Pieces:
Visions of My Sanity.
Wrestling Gods
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Re: Honourable Discharge.
My Dearest Dornick's...there is no doubt as to why this was Spotlighted my friend...it's so very well written with very effective and emotional depth, as well as his walk through crowd's aimlessly the imagery of this Soldier and his inner demon's were captured so well in your word's.....A great write. CONGRATULATIONS Musie