The oak tree on fifth street

[Nakedpoet]

The jogger who found him
Runners brand
Said it all
-Just do it-
And he did
But the boy's in blue
Did'nt have a clue
Lifeless legs swinging from a tree
Was not away to be free
From depression and misery
Though who know's
Until you walk in somebody's elses shoes
Who can judge
God?
Maybe his suffering soul
When it gets to heaven
Will cry foul
-God will not be judgeing him-
-He will be judgeing God-
The Oak seed was planted
The year he, was born
Had grown ten foot tall
By the 30th fall
Of his 5th mental illness suffering
Leafs from the Oak tree
Live and die
Floating, fluttering down to earth
Starting out green
Then turning brown
Just the way
The story of his life lay
His last thought was
God's gunna have hell
To pay
Though the jogger's
Who past the Oak by
Still wonder why
He took his life.

[everhopeful]

Even with the sense of tragedy, this feels like more of a social critique than a lament on behalf of the random person who took their own life; the fact nobody can ever ask them what made them finally take that way out only leads to mystery, speculation, and like in this poem, questions toward God.

[ladylilith]

I thought this was a terribly compelling, and also sad, piece. I was totally taken aback by the direction this took! Didn't see that coming at all! I do so love to be shocked, so bravo for that, for one. I thought that, tragedy aside, it makes something of a comment on society, or on the way we can be expected to live our lives out. By the branding references especially, I thought that was an incredibly clever part. Really great work! I was taken with the read, very much so.

Lily^^

[Raven (ARGD)]

I think this is one of my favorites from you, NP. I also found this very compelling, but your work usually is, I think. I really like your writing style for these story-like pieces. While I also see the theme here of the unanswered questions surrounding a stranger's suicide, the things others wonder, I focused more on what this poem was saying about those other people rather than the person who died. I think it's strange how people sometimes see nothing wrong with the way they pass judgment on the actions of others without having any understanding of their situations, or really, of anything beyond their own personal experiences. I've heard so many talking disapprovingly about someone who died that way, when... really, you have to imagine that anyone who's driven to that must be in an impossible situation or in an unbearable amount of pain.

Anyway, I like the imagery here, the metaphor of the falling leaves, the progression of the piece. I particularly liked what you revealed this person's final thoughts to be, the anger there. It's a delicate subject, all of this, but I think you did something cool with it.

[rupertpupkin]

Hi, I loved the language used in this compelling read. Wonderful stuff.Really not what I was expecting going by the title,great job,well done with this,Sean.

[tangerinepie]

Yes,I also was very taken with the many concepts a poem like this invokes.I find that people are often more concerned about the spiritual consequences of suicide, no matter what the motivation.In this case the fallen man asks his own questions regarding Gods opinion, and then his own anger directed back at God.You wrote a significant poem here that still inevitably has us searching for answers.There is obviously an unbearable snapping of reason in suffering that cannot be tolerated.JMO though..Very well told story..Tangie..

[allmirth]

This is indeed, most moving, compelling and thought-provoking poem. No one really knows other peoples journeys. They do well if they understand their own. Congratulations on a well deserved Spotlight.

Thanks much for sharing.
Mirthy

[dwells]

A palpable and poignant portrayal of something beyond mortal comprehension and apprehension. The wondering "why?" indeed, sadly told tale, cheers!

[PoeTAndrEw]

The Use of the "word GOD" in this peace erks me greatly. BUT this was very interesting in the WAY you put the situation and the circumstance in which forces the reader to ponder "of" and lends emotional turmoil? Loveth one who can envoke these elements be immortal no?

[rupertpupkin]

Didn't take this one long to earn a spotlight and rightly so. Hard hitting and brutally honest in it's approach. Some great lines in there. Well done with this and congrats on the spotlight, Sean.

[Josie]

I liked the way you connected the tree to the boy who took his own life. The clue you gave about mental illness opened up a lot of questions about the treatment and medication he was receiving. The jogger probably watched some movie where the crowds taunted a would be jumper with words to do it. He was left reflecting and wondering if his words might have triggered the boy to commit suicide. The poem evoked at lot of thinking. Congratulations on the TPS Spotlight recognition.

[wendellgee]

I like the thought about the suicide judging God because it fits my own perspective of submission to the absolute mystery of life. the rhythm of this was amazing. thank you for sharing.

[everhopeful]

The seemingly irreverant start to this one only makes the realisation of the true theme hit home even harder. I thought that running the story of the victim parallel to the growth of the tree was a nice touch too, the comparison between something that withers and then renews itself and the man's suicide added a visual dimension and wry, tragic irony.
Congratulations on the spotlight.

[dornicks]

A sensitive and sympathetic write on what,in many cases, will always be a mystery. A topic well handled. Congratulations on the Spotlight,

dornicks

[Simran]

Very aptly has it been put that who knows until you walk in someone's shoes. God knows what drives someone to take such an extreme step. Loved the way the words moved. Quite an interesting take on God as well, a denunciation of sorts of His ways. This one most deserves the spotlight . Congrats!

[Dew]

Really liked the indignant way the author addresses this tragedy...maybe we've got it wrong and God will tell him that he did an exemplary job, given all the handicaps...an evocative write! Congrats on spotlight! - dew

[Nakedpoet]

Thanks all friends for the comments and congrats.

[Raven (ARGD)]

I just saw your spotlight icon in your signature and hurried off to find this! Ugh, I can't believe I'm only just finding out about it! As I told you when I first read this one, I do think this is possibly my favorite of your poems, so I'm glad you've been recognized for it. I thought this was a really impressive piece.

The first lines are a perfect example of what makes me so drawn to your poetry; something I keep struggling to express:

The jogger who found him
Runners brand
Said it all
-Just do it-
And he did

It's so understated, you know? You write in a way that I want to describe as "welcoming". It's like reading someone's thoughts, and I find that it suits a story so well. Reading your stories is quite like experiencing them, I think. The ending too is that way particularly. Personally, I find it most difficult to write beginnings and endings, so I love how neat this is.

Anyway, just wanted to say I'm so glad to see you in the spotlight... or to see you've been in the spotlight! Congratulations, my friend!