Pride and Prejudice
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Across the cafe table
I watched you sip your tea.
Like some other madeleine it took you away,
Dissolved you in a fragrant steam.
Reaching for your hand, I found your tatty paperback.
Your talisman.
Flicking through its pages, I tried to find you.
I watched you sip your tea.
Like some other madeleine it took you away,
Dissolved you in a fragrant steam.
Reaching for your hand, I found your tatty paperback.
Your talisman.
Flicking through its pages, I tried to find you.
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
I love how gentle this piece comes across. You present the reader with some really nice images and I felt like you conveyed such intricacies about this person in really such few lines. I loved the idea of trying to find someone through the books they read. I've always felt that what sort of book a person reads says a lot about them and that every book you read does, indeed, contain a part of you that you shared with the pages. It's a romantic ideal, but you express that here very well. Nicely done.
All I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by.
Re: Pride and Prejudice
Such a simple, short poem that paints a powerful portrait! It shares a theme with Maya Angelou's Communication I, but delivers the message in a slightly more subtle, and therefore meaningful, way. Spectacular writing!
Welcome to TPS! I look forward to reading more from you.
AMD
Welcome to TPS! I look forward to reading more from you.
AMD
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
Welcome to TPS! This is a beautifully written piece. Soft, gentle with a sadness that lingers through each line. I really loved this one, its a charming piece that brims with such delicate pain, ah, it's just a fantastic piece! :)
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
Naturally, I was attracted to the title of this piece. I'm surprised others have resisted the temptation of it! Heh. I really enjoyed what you did here. You build a scene, create a sensory kind of atmosphere that is almost touchable, and then what you did with the 'paperback' - that was clever!
Highly resonant, and engaging, work!
Lily^^
Highly resonant, and engaging, work!
Lily^^
"The night is dark and full of terrors."
- miharu
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
This piece is so beautiful, it makes me want to cry. The length not withstanding, I feel like you have conveyed so much emotion and so much of the story in these lines that I am envious of your talent. The lines "Like some other madeleine it took you away, / Dissolved you in a fragrant steam." were tangible to me. I am a huge tea fan... my friends say my collection is absurd. So this imagery was particularly potent to me. This is a bookmarked piece for me. Much enjoyed!
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
A very enjoyable short piece. As mentioned before, the image you create is catchy and nicely drawn.
- allmirth
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
Wonderful!
Like some other madeleine it took you away,
Dissolved you in a fragrant steam.
What an evocative line. (Proust fan here)
Where did they go, where is their Combray? Can you retrieve them in their talisman? In the pages of their book? Pride and Prejudice, in presume.
I am so glad this was Spotlighted, for it seems I missed it before. Congratulations! Exalt worthy poetry.
Thanks so much for sharing.
Mirthy
Like some other madeleine it took you away,
Dissolved you in a fragrant steam.
What an evocative line. (Proust fan here)
Where did they go, where is their Combray? Can you retrieve them in their talisman? In the pages of their book? Pride and Prejudice, in presume.
I am so glad this was Spotlighted, for it seems I missed it before. Congratulations! Exalt worthy poetry.
Thanks so much for sharing.
Mirthy
Last edited by allmirth on September 5th, 2013, 6:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
Not judging a book by its cover, wonderfully said with a wistful touch of something unknown perhaps, and bound to so remain, cheers!
- platinummoon
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
I can only echo all that has been written above. Look foreward to reading more of your work.
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
I really enjoyed this one. Congrats on the spotlight, most deserving, well done with this captivating write, Sean.
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
it has the pleasing ambience of a quality café, which I think adds much to your piece.
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
Such a compelling piece of work!
There's something magical about the phrasing; like not only her was dissolved within the lines, but the reader as well! Like they said above, there's something bittersweet about this, maybe her disappearance is for her sake, she can't stomach being in such atmosphere, too proud, yet the speaker is trying to resonate with that, and the past tense used making it more effective, like has he found her yet or still?
Congratulations on the deserved Spotlight!
Sash
There's something magical about the phrasing; like not only her was dissolved within the lines, but the reader as well! Like they said above, there's something bittersweet about this, maybe her disappearance is for her sake, she can't stomach being in such atmosphere, too proud, yet the speaker is trying to resonate with that, and the past tense used making it more effective, like has he found her yet or still?
Congratulations on the deserved Spotlight!
Sash
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
Although this is concise, I think that plays to the theme of the poem, one of an impending search and a thirst for more knowledge of someone than the speaker currently has. Even saying so little about them seems to tell us an awful lot!
Excellent work, congratulations on the spotlight!
Excellent work, congratulations on the spotlight!
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
I love the way this poem develops, the scene moves smoothly from something physical to something emotional. Well written, too, the description of this scene conjures up a clear image in my mind.
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
I'm more than happy to add my voice to those above me on this piece and to congratulate you on being Spotlighted,
dornicks
dornicks
- Simran
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Re: Pride and Prejudice
Congrats on the spotlight. Being relatively new to the forum, would have missed a beauty but for the Spotlight!
We search for our loved ones and keep them alive in various things. The Talismans! Congrats once again
Simran :-)
We search for our loved ones and keep them alive in various things. The Talismans! Congrats once again
Simran :-)
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