Poetic Distractions

[Philip16]

Walking home

Effluent from roadside drainage ditch
Mundane dispatch from recent rain

Transforms

Aqueous escapee, in daring maneuver,
Surreptitiously slips concrete bunker
No longer tolerating status quo
Slowly snaking path to freedom
Joining covey of similar ilk
In pothole.

Drizzle slows

Clouds clear as expected
Weatherman right again

Transformed

Brilliant display from solar domain
Saturates soggy bottom land
Blades bent, disheartened,
Release their burdens,
Bathe in Light.

Opening door

"Honey I'm home!"
"Good. Take out the garbage."

Dissolves
Evolves

Knight errant, drained by quest,
Drops to knee on native soil,
Revived by kinsmen
Trophies unpacked
Feast awaits!

[songofmeadow]

There is much to take in here inviting the reader to re-read! The structure and word choices amount are undeniably good, I was especially impressed by the use of line breaks which in turn give the feel of metamorphosis in their transitions 'transforms aqueous escapee' was a good surprise as was 'soggy bottom land', the latter making me smile as it made me think of a Cohen Bros. film. Much enjoyed thank you mx

[Sasha]

Like meadow, this such a gripping work, that definitely demands more than one glance.
Love the striking use of language, vivid diction, and the visual presentation, and how you gave this period of time of 'walking home' so many detailed importance while passing by. There's a clever transition, and contrast, and a whole cycle underlies the whole poem.
Excellent work!

Sash

[anthonycoll]

"Honey I'm home." "Good, take out.the garbage." How true,how wonderfully true. Your ability to see poetry in nature as you walk along is amazing! Thanks for sharing!

[dornicks]

'As the weary ploughman homeward plods'. A well defined and composed piece,in and between the lines. Thank you for sharing this,

dornicks

[JASON]

interesting take on things,cleverly worded...congrats on the spotlight.
don't understand your last stanza - care to shed some light??

[Rainman]

I like the way this discovers poetry in the mundane, some of the lines read like cryptic crossword clues from The Times, small events waiting to be "solved" by the observant mind. Quite an original piece, I liked it.
Deservedly takes a bow centre stage.

[dornicks]

Congratulations on making it to the Spotlight,deservedly.

dornicks

[dwells]

Congrats on the Spotlight Philip and this was a text book lesson in making the mundane seem very special in the focused poetic eye. Those who know us best perhaps also know that they can take us for granted, and do so in their own quest for something else, while we fade into the common and comfortable of shared worlds - cheers!

[Josie]

Congratulations for the TPS Spotlight recognition. I laughed and enjoyed the waters escape beyond its boundaries. I liked the description of the homecoming with the reality that some things don't change like responsibilities of taking out the trash, but what joy there is being with family and sharing a feast.

[everhopeful]

This is really a poem for poets, it made me smile so wide when I figured out what you were doing with it. Sometimes to see the world through a poet's eyes makes all of the difference, even if we can be guilty of romanticising the everyday and over-describing the mundane. I love poetry from the margins of life, and this is a fine tongue-in-cheek example of that.
Congratulations on the spotlight!

[rupertpupkin]

Brilliant word choices and use of language make this a most deserving spotlighted poem ,nice one ,Sean.